photo by rohtrs
The other day I was thinking to myself, as usual, about my shyness and anxieties and ways to start breaking away from them. I also happened to be surfing the web and I think I was looking at Gala Darling’s video folder on Flickr. I guess by now you’re already guessing how I came to the idea of making a silly video of myself and posting it to Youtube and this blog.
I’ve always been terribly shy of cameras, I think the idea of exposing myself is very frightening. Also by publishing it, I think I get a sense of lacking control, being out in the open where anyone can judge. You know, all those irrational fears.
Recently, I’ve had already broke the “published photography fear”. But video is a bit more tricky, it brings more to the plate because there’s also voice and movement. You not only need to try and relax your pose but also your movement and your voice. What you say and how you say it matters too. It kinda makes this experience somehow relate to a social situation.
So, back to the main pint, I challenged myself to do the video and publish it!
Now that I’ve done it, I feel like I just got something out of the way. And my anxiety levels weren’t as high as I expected. I did acted slowly and with caution though, which I always do when I’m not entirely comfortable with something.
And here is the final result, for everyone to see,
And to anyone curious about what happen to my pinkie: it was just a bad karate kick defense.
Even it’s only baby steps, any challenge overcame it’s a victory.
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| [ tags ] communicating • goals • insecurity • optimism • well-being |
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